fed up... and done ...

Sometimes i wonder why i am here, what is my purpose.. i feel like i have let so many people down in my life.. and that i just cant live up to what everyone expects of me... as much as i try and try to be what they want its like i just cant.... and its like should i even have to try to live up to their standards or just my own.... i want to make them happy but at what cost... i want to do what i want.. i want to be able to reach my goals because i want them not because they want them for me... i mean yeah if they support me thats great.. but i dont want to do something just because they want me too. i am sick an tired of being someone im not.. i want what i want.. screw what other people think of what i want.. deal with it.. if you love me and want me to be happy then let me go after my own dreams..... okay.. just let me be happy and follow my heart and go after my dreams and not the ones u have for me... AHHHHHHH im done please everyone else.. its time for me to be happy and do what i want to... darnit... i will do what makes me happy forget the rest... starting right now.. I am going to do what makes me happy forget what anyone else thinks.. i need to come first for once in my life...